heart talk / sanctification / The Mapps Quest

The Struggle is REAL.

Writing this for my class at Liberty University.. and thought that it was worth sharing…

If I were to apply a biblical world view to my desires it would look like Philippians 2:3-5, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.” I have been given the ability, through what Christ has done on my behalf, to make decisions for the good of myself, the good of others, and to glorify God through those decisions. Therefore, it is extremely important for all of my thoughts and desires to be taken captive and help up to the perfection of Christ.

This week God has been showing me how my desires can create conflict, especially inside my own mind. I am working on my second degree while using the one I am currently pursing (graphic design) in my job at my church. I do not make very much money, and I am about to turn 38. I used to be the main provider in our household when I did architectural drafting, but after meeting Christ, my life began to go in a different direction. Now I try to go where God leads me, overlooking what the world says makes sense, and living for Christ instead. But then there are days like today, when all I really want is a pool, a new kitchen, and lots of money for traveling.

Thankfully, and because of where I work, I have great godly women, who I can turn to when I am feeling so selfish, that point me back to Christ and His will for my life. Philippians 2:12-13 says, “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” My view of God and His work in my life is shaped by scripture, telling me that He is actively working in me for good. So when I feel those aches of selfishness and decide to lean on my sisters in Christ, I can be assured that it is God who is changing me from the inside out. It is no work of my own, and that brings satisfaction that money cannot.

How I wish I could always think outside of this temporal world and into eternity with Christ! But God has given me a gift in living in this world, and experiencing life before and after knowing Him. Without this gift I would only know the struggle of this place, and I am grateful that it is only a matter of time before I see my Savior face to face.

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